there's a gap in between
“Another time Billy heard Rosewater say to a psychiatrist, ‘I think you guys are going to have to come up with a lot of wonderful new lies, or people just aren’t going to want to go on living.'” – vonnegut, slaughterhouse five
Thomas and I are “on a break” because i can’t get over madeline at all. i don’t really know what to say about it. i’ve spoken with erik about it and he agrees that because of how i’m feeling its probably the right thing to do. but i feel really terrible about it. i honestly didn’t think that it was too soon but i guess it was because now i’m dealing with all of this crap about it. i don’t know. i wish i would feel better about it. like i knew that it would be okay or anything really. i’m just so damn sad all the time anymore. and i compare him to her all the time and that’s unfair to all of us. i need to figure out what the hell is wrong with me before i go forcing my problems on another person. i really truly loathe myself right now. i ruin everything i touch.