99 reasons

i came up with a huge list of reasons why i really really dig him. it was like forty items long before i decided i might want to try to quit. it was great. and i like that i can come up with so many reasons. marvelous.

i hung out with j tonight for the first time really since we broke up. or i guess the first time since that time where we broke the news of kate/marcus to each other during the day after. we talked about deep things which was really cool. i like deep conversations with him. and i think that’s why i liked him in the first place. i’m just not too sure why the relationship part didn’t work out between us.. but i guess it happens in that way sometimes and sometimes you just have to figure yourself out in relation to the other person and take what you can and move on. and i’m glad moving on doesn’t mean we can’t still talk and hang out. cos he’s pretty kickass. despite how shitty i’ve felt about him. i no longer need to overdramatize that situation to make its outcome seem necessary.

the seeing my cousin was amazing. i had a really nice time talking to him and his wife who i’ve never met. they have a really cute dog too. and it was nice to just get to see him now that i’m a grown up. cos before i always just thought i should be a grown up. lol. hanging out with kevin makes me remember when matchbox20 was the coolest thing.

• Category: Journal