the cocaine cowboy goes to war again
i spent too much money today. but that is besides the point of this entry.
today there were these kids on campus (8th graders for a career fair) and i almost had to throw down because one of the little bitches was making fun of something steve said. but then i realized she was a minority and a woman and would be perpetually damned to swimming back and forth the rio grande trying to have little babies on american soil before she got shot. tsk tsk. anyway. joe, jaquelyn, brandon, steve, and cari (who was doing her campus visit before transfering and living with me next year) were all sitting at the same table as i, next to these children. so someone asks the kids where they’re from and one is like “JCN, what what?” and i thought about poking her eyes out or pointing out their horendous basketball record because this is usually the theme with me talking about schools with whom i dont’ have direct forensics ties. so then one of them says some school near atchison (could be JCN as far as I know) and i say “Joe LOVES Atchison.” so they start talking to Joe. then they swarm our table. I’m not kidding. we had to have all of the 8th graders in Kansas gathering like Joe was Hitler for the current proclamation of the status of Youth under the Third Reich. and they get all weird and get Joe’s autograph and Brandon tries to get head from one of the girls. anyway, 1 o’clock approaches and Joe and I have class so steve and cari and joe and i walk to class after parting the sea of middleschoolers.
This ends the majority of the journeys involving middleschoolers for the day, but not mine. It turns out their career day festivities are in Stauffer where I have my next class. So I get to ST and the leaders of their pack are like “hey we remember you from lunch!” and i was like “um it was about 2 minutes ago. i hope you wouldn’t have forgotten…” and then they ask the name of the kid in the green shirt. so i said “Joe. Do you want his email address?” and they all say yes of course because Joe has this weird cult at Miege where he graduated and I desired to expand it to Atchison as well. Anyway. I give them the email address and the proper spelling of the first and last name then I decide they probably should get his phone number too. So i start to write his celly down then realize that’s probably a bad idea cos Caitlin’s mom pays for that and write the number for the Jeff Phone down instead.
So far he has only received one phone call and it was a girl giggling who said she had a wrong number. Hot.
I feel bad for these kids because they’re going to grow up thinking Joe is cool and then they’ll be douchebags and this legitimization of joe’s small penis could actually stunt the growth of their penises which could mean an influx of lesbians which equals nazi-ism which means the only happy people will be trista who likes nazis and me who likes lesbians. sounds like a good time.
*note: trista is no more a nazi than lesbians cause nazi-ism.