Dave decided we were going to play a game.

Tonight, I lost my cellphone. I made the mistake of telling Dave Thoman that i lost it and having hm call my phone. When he found out that it was on silent he decided to take the opportunity to call me and leave messages until I found it. He left 20 messages. Awesome. It took me 15 minutes to listen to them. But that’s because 10 messages in I decided I should transcribe them:

Message 1: I’m assuming you have misplaced yr cellphone. Sorry.

Message 2: We’re going to play a game it’s called Jess has lost her phone and Dave’s going to call it as many times as he can for the next four hours because he’s at work and has nothing else to do and Jess is going to have to go through her voicemail and erase every single message. Are you excited? Cos I am.

Message 3: Voice mail number 3.

Message 4: 4.

Message 5: Cincoooooooooooooooooooooo!

Message 6: Rooookuuuu

Message 7: Okay so really there are only three languages I can count in one of them being English. Seven.

Message 8: (Pause) Um. It beeps and tells me to leave a message 35 seconds into the phone call so I no longer have to turn the speaker phone on in order to know when to talk I can just wait till it says 35 seconds and then speak although it’s nice to have this sound so if I’m looking away, perhaps doing something on the computer, reading, doing homework, or maybe even my job i’ll know when to speak. Message eight. Over and out.

Message 9: I’m having way to much fun with this.

Message 10: I don’t know if way to much fun is the correct phrase so much as a really pathetic amount of fun. I don’t know.

Message 11: That last message wasn’t very well thought out at all probably been sending an increasing amount or level of messages on facebook. i’m getting excited.

Message 12: No Honestly this is getting pretty pathetic.

Message 13: I really like the idea of Dick Cheney pouring over my phone bill and reading my list of outgoing ingoing and missed calls and this being like fifteen calls twelve o’clock at night. what the fuck.

Message 14: I’ve been trying to count money or change and make messages at the same time and the fact that i can’t count period and then i’m distracted has really exacerbated the fact that i am constantly getting money wrong at the front desk.

Message 15: Fuck. I just had to recount the nickels.

Message 16: I don’t know if when you listen to voicemails the order they come in if its in chronological order or if its backwards but i really like the idea of it being backwards because then you’re just going to be like what the fuck i mean you’re probably going to be like what the fuck anyway when you get all of these but you know it would just add another element to it.

Message 17: Hey. Just calling seeing what you were doing. If you have anything exciting going on tonight. Call me back later. Bye.

Message 18: Hey! What did the big firecracker say to the smaller fire cracker? My pop is bigger than yrs.

Message 19: Tastes like v e g. That’s no good. Alright well I’m going to take apart the room looking for my celly phone. See ya. I wonder if you find yr celly phone before voicemail number 19.

Message 20: I have a paper due tomorrow morning. Actually, this morning. and I can totally see it not getting done and this being the reason why.

—End—

Chronologically this would be first, but one reads a really mopey entry so I’m going to enslave myself to blog laws of traffic and put this last:

Well. My weekend has sucked. Until today. I’ve been too depressed to drink (not that that matters but I was planning on going out to parties both Friday Night and last night and I didn’t even make it to the parking Saturday and on Friday night i wanted to forget everything that happened the hour before so bad that I decided maybe drinking just wasn’t for me.) Long story short: my mom and brother haven’t been getting along and friday night, my brother broke his leg. Oh my oh my. Nothing to make a tense situation worse than locking them in the same house together by virtue of their habits or their now-broken-legs. So hopefully things get worked out there. And maybe this will be okay. Who knows.

I prayed about it. And that turned out pretty well. Mass was really good. One of those masses where everything just seemed to be directed at me, I have a lot of those. I also weep a lot during mass, but i’ve decided just to accept that. Today the songs were two about the beatitudes (both the recessional and the processional). And offering was something I really like but now don’t remember… something about God leading us wherever we go… and communion was “I know you are near”. The message was very “God works miracles when you stay out of the way.” Which I think I needed to hear. I’ve been putting too much stress on myself because of these family problems. And maybe it’s time that I just pray about it.

• Category: Journal