Author: Jess

I got the job at Family Video. That’s so exciting! I’m really happy about it because I just feel like the job is going to be a good fit. I’ve already written about how difficult it is for me to find a new job that I like and when I showed up for the skills test and later for the interview with the district manager I still had the feeling that I’d like to work in the store a whole lot. I suppose I should address this as it happened. The skills test basically blew me away. I’m not going to say it was hard or anything, because for the most part I think it was probably scored really realistically and that I probably killed the competition. I’m a standardized tester. It’s sort of my thing. But the test was so incredibly taxing. Because it wasn’t like the ACT or GRE or even the SAT where they sort of mix up the difficulty of the teste (well the GRE doesn’t… but they mix up the kind of questions you’re answering… and if you start to suck cos yr tired then you’ll get easier questions for a smidge). So this test just got progressively more difficult as you went on and it was timed. The longest section was 10 and a half minutes and that was math word problems. The hardest question on the test was “What is the square root of 20736?” I’m not kidding. The answer is 144, i found out later. I figured it would be sometehing like that. But seriously. What were they thinking. There’s just next to no way I would even do the work to figure that out mentally. After an hour and a quarter of skills test or so… I was freed from the video store to await my test results. Rock. By about 3:30 or so I was sitting in the history department and received a call from Tyler (the manager) asking if I could come for the final part of the interview where I sit down with the district manager.

My interview with the district manager went incredibly well. She’d just purchased the shirt I was wearing a few days prior at Old Navy. She’s a catholic. We both like to talk all the time. She’s abrasive in that way that I like in people. It was awesome. So eventually trying to figure out if I’d be a good hire turned into just shooting the breeze with me turned into offering me a job. I only make 6.5 starting out but they move me up to seven in like 20 days or something. That’s exciting. And I’m happy to have something else to do for a change. I’m still working at the Cap-J and probably won’t stop that anytime soon. I’m just glad that I have nights and weekends during which I can work. I start Friday probably.

I’m sort of inspired to write new poetry again. I’d been in another dry spell, save that poem that I didn’t like that much about drinking Ginger Shandy at McCoys with Kyle and Banks/sleeping on Banks’ floor with Kyle. These ones should be good. One is exploring metaphor of breaking up. The other is a frank look at body image and what it means and how i struggle with it. I might try to work on them in a bit here at work, but I think they’re the kind of poems you hand-write on notebook paper and then type. They’re definitely not the kind that you just type outright. They’re not going to come that easily. When I finish these words you will see your face in them and never think to ask me who’sitabout?

The second poem is inspired by my trip to Target with my mom. We went to lunch then we went to buy polos.  The thing is, I really like my body most of the time.  But i’m at that point where clothes shopping is just really difficult.  My weight is stable right now… which is both good and bad.  But I don’t know.  Shopping with mom is frustrating. Cos I feel like she basically just tells me that I’m fat and look unnattractive in everything I try on.  I practically had a panic attack before I left the dressing room for the first time today and then couldn’t come out in anything.  Agh.  Frustrating.

Logan has lived here for a full twenty-four hours and I think things are all going well.  He still prefers to be under the bed, but he did climb up onto the bed three whole times last night! It was really cute.  He’s also decided he’s no longer boycotting food/water and the litterbox like he was yesterday.  He didn’t have any accidents or anything, he just held it I guess.  Kyle bought him a collar and a little jingle for it.  The jingle just says LOGAN and my phone number and then the city. It’s cute.  And it’s nice cos you know where he’s coming.

Dear Jess, The heaviness is lifted off your shoulders and your heart. Difficult circumstances that have been weighing on you for too long are now transforming from heavy metals into spiritual gold. The philosopher’s stone may be working magic for you now, but you cannot take anything for granted. Temper your excitement with humility and gratitude.

Oh yes. Oh. Oh. Oh. Yes.  By the way. I received word that I’d taken second for the Rehkopf award which is pretty sweet. It means I get a little cash which I desperately, desperately need.  And it’s an honor.  Yay for papers about Kansas!

Also, my mom and i aren’t fighting.  Cos I’m getting a second job.  And she let me move Logan into his home finally.

And Logan is around the house.  And he likes me and he likes the house, it seems. He was so adorable, snooping about and taking it all in.  Then he hid under the bed cos that’s what cats do for their first day in a new place.  I love him.  And I love living there.  It’s so much fun.  And I like eating in all the time.  It’s great. I like having a list of to-dos at a place which belongs to me.

Ah! Apparently I dazzled Family Video well enough to get called back.  The problem with my trying to get a job is that usually somewhere during the application process I realize that I absolutely do not want the job.  This is what happened at Shawnee North (though, it turned out, they did want to hire me).  It’s also what happened at Michael’s (even though I love Michael’s I wouldn’t want to work there cos it would taint something I enejoy). Basically, it’s what happens everywhere.  So most of my jobs are the result of my mom getting pissed and calling people to see if they’ve considered my application.  She’s a hero, that one.  I’m so spoiled with jobs like the Cap-J and the History Dept. and the Leadership Institute because I have so little work to do and I like the people I’m around… and whee all those things are great.  So I only want a job if I think I’ll like doing it.  And that never ever ever happens.  Until today.  Today, I went for the open interviews at the family video and when I got there I was like “yay! MOVIES I LOVE MOVIES YAY!” and so I tried really hard during the interview.  I even chose my “favorite movies” for the application based on different genres so I wouldn’t look like a  low budget film snob.  Lol.

I got called back by like 6:30 and they only stopped doing interviews at 6… so hopefully that means something good… and hopefully this works out well for me.  I still have to take a skills test tomorrow which will take about an hour apparently… which seems ridiculous.  So anyway, I’m excited.  And I hope the process keeps going well… cos the odds that I’ll find another job which I want are slim to none.

Kyle took me gooney golfing today at the sports center after much ado on my part. I wasn’t sure when I’d get to see him again on account of my having a kitty to stay home with and his brother being in town so our usual split week in Topeka and Blue Springs wouldn’t work out after today and my mom and I have been fighting non-stop about the cat (mom is projecting. you know how she gets upset when things change and she feels like she’s losing me so she’s blaming everything from my being unbelievably irresponsible to Kyle for her anger toward me. and she’s probably going to screw me out of 80 dollars which is stressing me financially. and she’s telling me i look fat in all of my clothes and just generally making me feel like shit about myself.) So anyway… I wasn’t sure when I’d make it to blue springs or have Kyle make it here again and I spent the whole law and order block fretting on the couch about mom and things so then i needed cheering up so i convinced kyle we could go gooney golf and get ice cream. luckily, he agreed. and then he commented that he hated how i swindle him into things 🙂 I claimed that I don’t swindle him, and i don’t think i do, but we had a fun time when we went.

Kyle golfed a 51 and I golfed a 59, meaning he technically won by 8 strokes. I had seven strokes on a par 2 because I’m bad at the one where you have to get the ball into the snail’s shell so it will come out onto the back part of the green. Suckage. I also got a hole-in-one cos i pretty much rock when put to the test. This is how that happened…

Kyle: Heh, this one seems like the type you could make out in.
[Kyle hits ball into love-hut element and it bounces into and out of the hole.]
Jess: D’ya want me to just give you that one? Cos I’ll just give you that one.
Kyle: No, I’ll just take my 2 cos it’s not like you’ll do better.
[Jess sinks hole-in-one. Celebrates.]
Jess: I’m awesome!
Kyle: Good job, baby.
Jess: C’mon. Wanna make out in the hut?

We’re adorable. And we’re spoiled on each other this summer. Between our comfy bed, our mutual adoration of the Jacks (McCoy and Bauer), and the amount of fun we have in each other’s company… the school year will be hard. On the bright side, we’ll both be incredibly busy and after the year is done… we’re golden.

Things are really comfortable with his parents now. After spending Sunday and yesterday around them, I think we’re all warming up to each other and that makes me happy. Plus, the dog loves me a whole lot. Mostly cos the dog likes to chew on feet and hair and I’ve got both. The dog does its part by reminding me why I never want to have a puppy.

Saturday night we went over to Chad and Lilia’s and spent some time with them. That was a whole bunch of fun. I really like Lilia a lot, and Chad too. So it’s nice to keep in touch with people from around and it’s fun to have “couple friends” I think as well. Ah.

I promise I’ll be posting pictures of the apartment soon. Now that I feel like I’m actually settled in and almost have everything all set up, it makes sense to take pictures of all of it. Yay!

And I’m going to open interviews at Family Video tomorrow. Wish me luck! I need a second job so badly!

I’m reading Ecstasia by Francesca Lia Block right now.  It’s fantastic, of course.  Cos She’s just completely fantastic.  I’m really enjoying reading some early work by one of my favorite authors, cos I don’t take the opportunity to do that often.  And it’s nice because most of her non-Weetzie Bat fiction is written in the form of a poem these days or at least the last few things I’ve read have been, and I really like having actual prose to work through.  Poems read so quickly. She certainly hasn’t came into her style yet with this book, but I suppose it’s a bit difficult to do that when you haven’t really had anything published (or much published cos Primavera may technically pre-date this one).

The concept of the book is pretty awesome though. So far, figuring out what the book is going to be about is about as far as I’ve gotten… but anyway, it’s about this place called Elysia which usually means a very pleasant place like a paradise or something, but to live in Elysia you have to leave the desert which surrounds the place.  And then once you age, you have to go underground because everything in Elysia is beautiful and so there can be no signs of aging.  Also, apparently people self-police this habit so they just go underground willfully most of the time.  It’s a metaphor for Los Angeles.  I’m so excited to read more, which I should get to doing.

Ah, I’m basically all moved-in to my new apartment. I’m so happy! I have my room set up pretty sweetly, I’ll post pictures at some point.. but for now just a description. The room is a rectangle with East-West being the long end and North-South being the short end. The door is in the Northeast corner of the room so logically I put my bed facing the North wall in the West corner. Yay. It’s a queen so it was really nice to sleep on last night and have tons of space. Space is really the best thing to have in a bed, I think. Kyle’s claimed the outside though which I suppose is cool.. but I really love the outside. He’s the one that has to deal with me climbing over him at all hours of the night and morning when he’s still asleep. It’s cool though. Last night we slept with my comforter and his mom’s flannel sheets but today we went to bed, bath and beyond and pimped my room. We got 350 thread count cotton jersey sheets, a good compromise i think. They’re all fancy-like which he likes and i still get to sleep curled up in tshirts so I’m happy too. AND I got a fiberbed. It was maybe more than I wanted to spend or would’ve spent yesterday… but… I woke up this morning and had a terrible tightness in my shoulders from sleeping uncomfortably so that helped me out a whole lot. James went pillowshopping with me and talked me into getting a mountain of pillows yesterday, so now i sleep in a comfortable coccoon. I love it.

So that wonderful mess of pillows and microsuede is in that corner and then I have this fantastic lamp that my mommy got me thats right next to my bed. It’s a floor lamp and it’s made out of wood and it’s amazing. I love it. I can’t even explain it really. It’s just all wonderful and curvy. I think everyone would adore it as well, and so far they have. I’m currently looking for mods to make to it via readymademag or other DIY sites. So if you have any ideas, let me know. I think I’ll end up just decoupaging the lampshade. I’m not sure. On the wall next to that I have a bookshelf and there’s another one between the closet door and the bedroom door. My desk is going to go next to the bed and my tv at the foot of the bed. Hooray. Being moved out is awesome.