movie theater kisses

Jess on September 23, 2004

as the plot thickened,
their kisses became fevers
sweeping them
away from storylines
and actors
to somewhere new,
somewhere true

i watched,
envious
of a reckless abandon
i've never possessed
wishing maybe you
could perform on cue
so i didn't have to second guess

you're fingers
stirring on my thighs
in the way
you'll later learn ihopeihopeihope
drives me crazy
still later,
you catching my tears
and i knew:
i didn't have to
guess again

as credits rolled
our symbolic lovers rolled in
each others seperate dreams
and my lips
cursed me for not offering
a chance at reality

i follow their advice
(or was it divulge
in their desires,
) while my lips rejoice,
my lungs become violent:
it appears
they meant to keep
that breath

i explain
to every internal organ
he's the one
who made me
breathless
but
i didn't know,
boys could kiss
like that

trichotomy

Jess on September 22, 2004

fingers
racing, frantically
as
eyes
locked, immobile
while
lips
restless, chattering
so
many conversations,

i
understand
something
new (you)

untitled

Jess on September 22, 2004

so much gratiication,
as your fingers
and mine
lace themselves together
slowly, subtly
our hands
discover:
(these feelings
were mutual
all along)

a letter,

Jess on September 22, 2004

i hope you know when i said i'd been listening to work your way out and every angle basically on repeat it was because they made me think of you and funny how with every listen i saw a little bit more of you in each word.

i believe in you and i, requited

Jess on September 21, 2004

seeing you is
    beginning to crush me,
  i can only picture this bouquet
     and hide my smile
 at the sound of you
   saying my name;

star wars dvd is out today

Jess on September 21, 2004

lacey made me take ecinacea. i still feel like absolute shit. but there isn’t too much that i can do about it. the ecinacea is making my body want to sleep and stuff so i think i’m going to get going on that. thank god. i haven’t felt this sick for so many consecutive days in a long time. i think i’m on the upswing though. (see also, the economy). w00t. i don’t even know from where this is all coming. i’m sorry for getting all doped up on herbal remedies and hollering at my blog.

one skinnee j

Jess on September 21, 2004

i have a huge crush on j. except i’m pretty sure its not a crush cos i hate that word. i also think that its completely requited. just judging by what he says in his livejournal and stuff esp. after i see him. i don’t really know what to do about it. he’s supposed to be my mentor for fucks sake. but i just want him so badly. and he’s so beautiful. and i think we’d both gain so much. the sexual tension hasn’t reached the point yet that i can’t ignore it but it gets a little bit harder every time we speak and a lot harder every time we see each other. he’s so beautiful and amazing and wonderful and i wish i could just post this out in the open just to see how he’d take it. but instead: we, of course, dance around in our poetry pretending that the meaning isn’t granted, hoping that the other will just come right out and say it. but instead: we hide our meanings in source tags and codes.

dreaming

Jess on September 21, 2004

i think i had a dream about you, you were the beautiful one i couldn't get enough of…