later the same day
you knew who i was eating dinner with
and probably took it the wrong way
but i swear when i eat dinner with you
or dinner without you
its different
and i couldn’t even voice a general disdain for you
when i needed to force one
he wanted to know what i wanted
and where i’d live
i said i could find myself feasibly living with you
which he took to mean a constant state of drama
but you’re a constant state of contentment
, and justified
i could not live with you for that would be living
and living is over there on a shelf
maybe i didn’t get emily’s words right
but i know i nailed the emotion
why do i expect her to save me?
when she couldn’t save herself?