forget modern nature
today at work i had to do regional wrestling results by myself. regional wrestling consists of about 5 huge wrestling tournaments that are done in a relatively simple version of AP style. However, tonight… i was not prepped to arrive to regional wrestling mess and i really shoudln’t be working alone on a night this busy. so i finish the first meet which was like 5a regionals at salina and then eric comes back here (eric is my editor who didn’t schedule enough of us to work tonight) to say that Rick basically did it the wrong way and put it in the way we would do an actual wrestling meet. but we’re supposed to just do top 4 for regionals because they qualify to state. this would also have been much cooler because it doesn’t take nearly as long as all of the “Bob the Builder, KSU, pinned Lorne Michaels, SNL, 3:04” does. so that’s not fun at all. and its really shitty that instead of just having someone up front fix what rick did wrong they made me change everything about the format. and so we dont’ even have complete lines for the matches like we’re supposed to have. dammit dammit dammit.
in other news joe may or may not be making out with this girl that caitlin went to high school with or something but isn’t really friends with anymore. and they might mess around. and i was really jealous at first. but for odd reasons. i don’t know. i think it just made me realize that i should not have feelings for him because i have a boyfriend with whom i am monogamous and wish for things to stay well and together. so why these feelings for joe. i can give myself a thousand reasons not to date him. here goes.
1. squad cohesion.
2. i’m more attracted to his girlfriend.
3. whoa, hurt steve, whoa.
4. if i don’t want steve i don’t want a relationship period.
5. no kisses after oral sex, asshole.
6. no sex without his tshirt.
7. he’s too mean.
8. i’m pretty much just a slut. (well we both are)
9. i want someone who really cares about me
10. just came out of a long relationship
11. i might be a lesbian.
i think i’m just disappointed in him right now. mostly because i think this is kind of an episode of judgement that he’ll probably regret. i really respected that he put so much emphasis on various things and hasn’t really been involved with that many girls, you know, and now he obviously has changed from that mindset and its just kind of that ridiculous “i’ll take what i can get” attitude. and that’s really the impression i get of this girl. and that’s really unfair to her. and . . .
fuck. i’m like the worst girlfriend ever.